Prayers for a Fallen Officer

September 02, 2020
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St. Louis Police Officer Tamarris Bohannan was fatally shot in the line of duty in South St. Louis on Aug. 29. The Diocese of Missouri extends our prayers to the Metropolitan Police Department of the City of St. Louis, along with Officer Bohannan's family and friends. 

Jeff Roorda is the Business Manager of the St. Louis Police Officers' Association and a member of St. Paul's Episcopal Church in Carondelet. He shared this poem with us in honor of Officer Bohannan:

 

I WONDER HOW THEY SEE ME
by Jeff Roorda

I wonder how they see me
Behind this shiny shield.
Do they see me for the man I am
My truest self revealed?
 
Do they see my blemishes and warts 
The things I try to hide?
Do they comprehend the evil deeds 
Of man I can’t abide?
 
Do you think they know, with head hung low,
The things I’ve had to see?
Do they reckon I am someone else?
My God, it’s only me!
 
Can they hear the distant screams I hear
Each time I close my eyes? 
Can they feel the warm blood on their hands
Each time someone’s child dies?
 
As I’m damned with praise on darkest days
Can they perceive my pain?
Do they get I’m not immune to it
Just ‘cause I don’t complain?
 
Do the children of the cops I love,
Curse me for standing tall? 
Emotionless with a stiff, square jaw
As past me goes the pall,
 
Of a fallen brother carted off
To final resting place.
Life taken by the hand of the last
Demon that he faced.
 
And I wonder how they’ll see me when
It’s me who’s carted by. 
Do you think they’ll know how hard I fought?
I didn’t want to die.
 
Lord, I didn’t want to leave behind 
My loved ones and my kids.
I just tried to serve my fellow man
That’s really all I did.
 
But in the end, my loving God, 
I know you’re not surprised
That It only matters how I’m seen
Through Your forgiving eyes.
 
 
Author: Janis Greenbaum
Category: 02-MDisciples

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